Unite together

　　last time we had watched a movie about a team of basketball. from the movie i have learnt a lot, for example, we need someone give us some encouragement, when we come into the failure; but the more importmant is that the teammates need to unite together, when they face the troubles.

　　in the last match, when their teacher wasn’t there. the players can’t unite together, so that they can’t win the match. but when the teacher came, the captian of the team said that they can unite together again. and at last, they have won the match.

　　nowadays ,all of us enter the same class, and we have the same dream. so we must unite together like the team of the basketball. in this way that we can go into the university in the next year.

　　批 改 老 師lixiwang評      分90分級      別優(yōu)秀評      語

　　這是一篇電影觀后感，文章結(jié)合自己的學(xué)習(xí)實際，總結(jié)出應(yīng)當(dāng)團(tuán)結(jié)一致unite together，為了共同的目標(biāo)，立意深遠(yuǎn)，語言表達(dá)到位。希望糾正個別錯誤，以求完美。

　　1.                        a team of basketball應(yīng)為：a basketball team ；the team of the basketball也應(yīng)為：the basketball team .

　　2.                        注意時態(tài)的用法：last time we had watched a movie，應(yīng)為一般過去時。

　　3.                        the players can’t unite together, so that they can’t win the match.同上can’t 應(yīng)為：couldn’t

　　4.                        and at last, they have won the match.同上，去掉have

　　5.            in this way that we can go into the university in the next year. 此句應(yīng)為：in this way we can go into the university next year.