my life of future
in ten years i will be a reporter and i think i will live in beijing because i think as a student w e shuold love our counrtry and our capital i willl live in a apartment with my friends because i do not like living alone i think as a reporter i will meet a lot of interesting people i am a outgoing girl i want to be a reporter b ecause i like talking with people i have a lot of friends i know if i want to be a reporter i should study hard and get good grades
批 改 老 師toni評 分87分級 別優(yōu)秀批 改
1.文章沒分段,沒有標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號,句首字母應(yīng)該大寫,還要注意單詞i的書寫和標(biāo)題的首字母大寫。
2.and i think i will live in beijing because i think as a student w e shuold love our counrtry and our capital 此句前后沒有明顯的因果關(guān)系,可以改為:and i think i will live in beijing because i went to beijing last year and fell in love with it .
3.in a apartment應(yīng)為in an apartment.
4.a outgoing girl 應(yīng)為an outgoing girl.
5 .i want to be a reporter because i like talking with people i have a lot of friends 可改為i want to be a reporter because i like talking with people and want to have a lot of friends.
參考例句(文)
in ten years i will be a reporter.
and i think i will live in beijing because i went to beijing last year and i fell in love with it.i think i will live in an apartment with my friends because i do not like living alone .i think as a reporter i will meet a lot of interesting people .i am an outgoing girl,so i want to be a reporter because i like talking with people and want to have a lot of friends .
i know if i want to be a reporter i should study hard and get good grades now.