2020年高考全國1卷英語作文賞析

20xx高考全國1卷

　　假定你是李華，正在教你的英國朋友Leslie學(xué)習(xí)漢語。請你寫封郵件告知下次上課的計(jì)劃。內(nèi)容包括：

　　(1)時(shí)間和地點(diǎn);

　　(2)內(nèi)容：學(xué)習(xí)唐詩;

　　(3)課前準(zhǔn)備：簡要了解唐朝的歷史。

　　注意：

　　1.詞數(shù)100左右;

　　2.可以適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，以使行文連貫。

學(xué)生實(shí)例1

　　分?jǐn)?shù)：23.5 廣東湛江一中

　　Dear Ieslie,

　　As scheduled, we will have a Chinese lesson next weekend .Considering our students are preparing for their final exam,I suggest we have the lesson in the park near our school.

　　The mainly course of our class is to learn the poem of Tang Dynasty.It's universally acknowledged that the poem of Tang Dynasty is one of the solid foundations of our culture. A large number of talent poets showed their view about the society and expressed their satisfaction with the beauty of our motherland. You can broaden your horizon and have a better understanding of our colorful culture through this study.

　　Knowing the history of Tang Dynasty is better for you before having class. It's the society that creates the brilliant poem.

　　Yours

　　Li Hua.

　　點(diǎn)評：本文要點(diǎn)覆蓋較全面，文章結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，語法錯(cuò)誤較少，長短句運(yùn)用合理，結(jié)合了簡單句同時(shí)運(yùn)用了較多的復(fù)雜句式，如主語從句It’s universally acknowledged that…，強(qiáng)調(diào)句型It's the society that…非謂語結(jié)構(gòu)作狀語Considering our students are preparing for…等等;同時(shí)恰當(dāng)使用了一定的高級詞匯如solid foundation，broaden one’s horizons等。

　　建議：1 文章要點(diǎn)方面，建議時(shí)間更精確些，比如下周周幾幾點(diǎn)到幾點(diǎn);2 語法方面，注意細(xì)節(jié)語法的錯(cuò)誤，比如mainly改成main，poem改成poems等。

學(xué)生實(shí)例2

　　分?jǐn)?shù)：20 河南光山二高

　　Dear Lesile

　　How are you? I have learnt your progress in your Chinese with my help and your hard work. I am writing to tell the plan that what should you do in advance.

　　First, let's make it at eight o'clock in school library. We can consulted a number of books about the subject there. Second, the next theme is about Chinese culture especially the Tang poems that are full of history and act. I believe you will be attractive once you put your heart. Third I need you to perpare some work. The Tang poems are based on the Tang dynasty

　　so you should to look through the history and great happening.

　　As the saying goes no pains, no gains. Chinese is so beautiful and difficult that you need be involved sincerely. I am looking forward to starting our study.

　　Yours，

　　Li Hua

　　點(diǎn)評：本文要點(diǎn)覆蓋較全面，文章結(jié)構(gòu)較清晰，有恰當(dāng)?shù)你暯釉~使用，長短句運(yùn)用較合理;同時(shí)恰當(dāng)使用了一定的常用句式及諺語，如as the saying goes，no pains，no gains等。

　　建議：1 文章要點(diǎn)方面，建議時(shí)間更精確些，比如具體是哪一周哪一天的8點(diǎn);2 語法方面，注意細(xì)節(jié)語法的錯(cuò)誤，如can consulted改成can consult等;3 邏輯方面，注意詞和詞之間的單配邏輯，如you will be attractive once you…邏輯上不是很通順;4 單詞拼寫上，注意拼寫的準(zhǔn)確性，如perpare改成prepare等。

學(xué)生實(shí)例3

　　分?jǐn)?shù)：22 日照一中

　　Dear Leslie,

　　How's it going? Have you absorbed all the knowledge I taught you last time? Now let me tell you the information of next lesson.

　　I will give the lesson on next Saturday morning, from 8:00 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. at 101 Room in the teaching building in our school.

　　We are going to learn about Tang poetry, which is an extremely important part of not only Chinese language but also Chinese culture. What you need to do in advance is to know briefly about the history of Tang Dynasty. You can consult the Internet or the books I gave you. Besides, don't forget to review what you have learned before.

　　I am looking forward to our meeting. See you next week!

　　Yours,

　　Li Hua.

　　點(diǎn)評：本文要點(diǎn)覆蓋全面，行文流暢，有額外的細(xì)節(jié)添加，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰緊湊，語法錯(cuò)誤較少，運(yùn)用了一定的復(fù)雜句式，如定語從句which is an extremely important part…，主語從句What you need to do in advance is…等等;同時(shí)有一定的詞匯亮點(diǎn)如absorb，extremely替換了very等。

　　建議：句式方面，可以適當(dāng)再增加一些高級句式。