OnShyness(論羞怯)

　　On Shyness

　　Shyness is the cause of much unhappiness for a great many people. Shy people are anxious and self-conscious, that is, they are excessively concerned with their own appearance and actions. Worrisome thoughts are constantly occurring in their minds. What kind of impression am I making? Do they like me? Do I sound stupid? Am I wearing unattractive clothes?

　　It is obvious that such uncomfortable feelings must affect people adversely. A person's self-concept is reflected in the way he or she behaves, and the way a person behaves affects other people's reactions. In general, the way people think about themselves has a profound effect on all areas of their lives.

　　Shy people, having low self-respect, are likely to be passive and easily influenced by others. They need reassurance that they are doing "the right thing". Shy people are very sensitive to criticism: they feel it confirms their inferiority. They also find it difficult to be pleased by praise because they believe they are unworthy of praise. It is clear that, while self-awareness is a healthy quality, over-doing it is harmful.

　　Can shyness be completely eliminated, or at least reduced? Fortunately, people can overcome shyness with determined and patient effort in building self-confidence. Since shyness goes hand in hand with lack of self-esteem, it is important for people to accept their weaknesses as well as their strengths. Each one of us is a unique, worthwhile individual.We are interested in our own personal ways. The better we understand ourselves, the easier it becomes to live up to our full potential. Let's not allow shyness to block our chances for a rich and fulfilling life.

　　論羞怯

　　羞怯是許多人不快樂的原因。害羞的人焦慮不安，自我意識強，也就是說，他們過分在意自己的形象和行為。焦慮時�？M繞在他們的腦海中：我給人留下了什么印象?他們喜歡我嗎?我讓人覺得很傻嗎?我的穿著是否不吸引人?

　　顯而易見，這種不舒適的感覺必然給人們帶來了不利的影響。一個人的自我意識反映在他或她的行為上，而一個人的行為會影響他人的反應(yīng)。一般而言，人們認(rèn)識自己的方式對他們的生活的方方面面有深遠(yuǎn)的影響。

　　羞怯的人非常自卑，他們可能很被動，容易受他人的影響。他們需要得到他人的再次確認(rèn)：他們所做的是“正確的事情”。羞怯的人對批評很敏感，他們認(rèn)為批評使得他們更低人一等。他們也發(fā)現(xiàn)自己很難因為受到表揚而高興，因為他們相信自己不值得表揚。很明顯，盡管具有自知之明是件好事，但過度自謙則是有害的。

　　羞怯能根除嗎?或至少能減少些嗎?幸運的是，許多人能通過堅決而有耐心地建立自信來克服羞怯。既然羞怯與自卑天生相伴，那么人們能看見他們的優(yōu)缺點是很重要的。每一個人都是獨一無二的，都有其價值所在。我們對我們自己個人的方式感興趣。我們了解自己越多，我們就越容易充分發(fā)揮自己的潛能。不要讓羞怯妨礙我們實現(xiàn)富裕而有成效的人生。